June came and went in a flash of monumental activity. I guess I should tell you all about FITP (CT Film Institute Training Program) but I'm going to switch gears and instead of sputtering out how amazing the program was, I want to take a moment to talk about what happened during the time that I was in the program.
The weekend before starting FITP my uncle Emilio passed away. He was a quiet family man. Unassuming, my father's best friend for many years. Emilio worked for the Local 201 in NYC, a Painter. He was proud of his Spanish heritage. Born in a Naval Moral De La Mata, Spain - He's loving the World Cup Win from heaven! A few years ago, Emilio was in a bodega (grocery store) when he was spotted by a director shooting a commercial in a nearby park. He was asked if he'd like to participate. He said OK. Lo and behold he ended up on a Time Warner Cable commercial and received the coveted SAG card! The hoot was he did it cause it was fun! He made friends with the director and that director would call him and check up on him often throughout the years. That's the kind of man Emilio was. Everybody's friend. He had a story ready for the tell, a joke in his pocket to lighten the mood and the door to his home open to every person willing to climb the five flights of stairs of his NYC walk up.
Emilio's Passing taught me to value Time. You are never too old to give up a dream. Keep living. Keep having FUN.
During FITP we were working hard to prepare all the materials needed to bring to fruition the production of the short film To Dye For - written by Marty Lang. It was Directed by Richard Dobbs (of Law & Order fame), The heads of each of the departments were: Angelo DiGiacomo for Camera, Danielle Rigby for AD, Mike Barrows for Grip, Garret Boehling for Lighting, Virginia McCarthy for Script, DanaJean Cicerchi for Wardrobe, ( which was the department I was in), Chat Gunther for Sound, Maria Bierniak for Location, Jim Kent & Jonathan Tessler for Set & Props. Plus, Betty Chin in the Production Office.
An "A" list team of participants and cast rounded out the team that urged forward the four weeks of intensive instructions and "hands on" experience to get the project completed.
In the meantime the weekends were spent flying up to see Dad. He was not doing well.
Right before Memorial Day he had suffered a setback with his health. Hospice had been called in. We were looking at the end. We just didn't know when that end would be.
For those of you that don't know the story: "Dad" is John my Father-in-Law. My Papi, died 16 years ago. But John, may have well been my Dad. For the past 15 years he's been just that! My Dad. When I met my husband...(who happens to be named after his Dad - John), Dad took me in, made me his daughter and never looked back.
He was there when I had my accident. Understood my pain. Talked to me about his. Shared stories about his past. I felt honored to be given pieces of himself that I know he did not share with many people. Dad was a man of few words. You knew he liked something or he didn't by the way he stared you down. He had one favorite show: Law & Order. He died on the week of our pre-production.
I didn't get to tell him who our director was - he would have gotten a real kick out of that!
Dad's passing bought out a lot of strength in people amidst the sadness;
Cory gave up his 16th birthday gracefully - His grandfather passing that same day. The day prior we had returned from visiting on Father's day The last pictures of Dad are of Cory and he sitting together. Every trip up to MA, Cory was there to see him, sharing with the family and spending time.
John (my husband) withheld grief to travel to NYC to bring back cake, gifts, and my mom to acknowledge his son's special day. He did not want Cory's day to be overshadowed and knew that Dad would want us to keep Cory's day special.
Andrew & Matthew in their ultimate wisdom kept us cheerful, because Grandpa would want us to remember the "good times" and celebrate Cory's birthday (they are wonderful cousins). They had been staying with us while their parents went on a much needed short vacation. They broke the silence that descends on a moment like this. They kept the vibrancy of life alive in my home. I will forever be grateful for their presence. The hustle and bustle of young boys running around left little time to wallow in sorrow.
My Mom came from NYC (she and Dad) had a wonderful relationship throughout the years. She had seen him the week before and had had the chance to say goodbye. To her, John my husband is her son. So, she feels his every pain and love tenfold. Dad loved that about her and they often spoke and shared stories. At family gatherings you could find them off together whispering away about the "kids". Mom had three and Dad had five so they had lots to talk about. My mom is loved by all of John's brothers and sisters ( John's brother was vacationing in the DR when Dad died - that is baby brother Chris/ by the way I'm from the DR- Dominican Republic) and Dad loved my brother and sister as well.
As this had to be, I missed one day of FITP. That was the day I traveled up to Dad's Funeral. Leave it to him not to be all fussy about the whole thing. It so happened it was on his birthday. June 24th, 2010.
Dad would have been 75 years old. He was determined to make it. He was determined to get out of that Hospice one way or another. He was determined to live free of his illnesses (COPD - Don't Smoke People!) In his stubborn way..Damn it.. He did it! (Oh, He was determined I would meet the director of Law & Order...he did that too! Just wish he didn't go to such extremes to do it. I was getting there on my own. Humm- I wonder if this was all planned.. and he knew all along.)
His gift is of Determination. Every time Dad would call me he always wanted to know what was I up to. Had I gone on an audition? Was I doing a show? What new project was I doing? Was I famous yet?
He wanted 'IT' really bad for me. I want 'IT' really bad for me too. (Maybe he can finally tell me what 'IT' is!)
So, there was my June an amazing experience sandwiched between two very sad goodbyes. Strong links in the chain of my family snapped free, irreplaceable, unforgettable.
July opens with quiet whispers of things I can't decipher yet. Possibilities from the camp at FITP? Maybe?
The Movie Project ... (I'll write a blog about it later). But, basically I will be working with the writer Danielle Berarducci. The Investor/Producer Obaid Kadwani (still a dear friend) is looking for another style of writing than what was produced by the writer that was picked from the search we did. As we could not lock down a contract we felt it was best for parties to part. Danielle and I will continue to work on the script to bring it to fruition. (It's really Awesome!)
I don't know if I will ever write a detailed blog on FITP. It would mean having to separate the emotional experience from the practical and I'm not sure that I want to. Right know I am charged with such drive to push forward, as Chuck Miller says: "I've drunk the cool aid!", I don't want to diminish that feeling by dissecting down everything lived. Maybe I should just let it be?
Then again, I may change my mind, who knows. - KD
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